Gomennasai
by Kiri-tan
Summary: Were the final words Haku spoke to Chihiro true? What if they weren't?


Here's a short one that I wrote a wee while ago. I guess I was just surprised, or something, when - looking around the internet - I saw that most people had positive interpretations of the ending of Spirited Away. I've seen plenty of drawings, and read stories too, depicting Chihiro and Haku's reunion.

And, well, I suddenly had the random idea of, "What if Haku lied at the end?" And thus this short story was born.

Disclaimer: Spirited Away is not my creation.

(_Gomennasai_ is "sorry" in Japanese)

* * *

Gomennasai

Their footsteps slowed as they reached the top of the stone steps. Chihiro stared in wonder at the grassy plain before her.

"There's no water here… I can walk across now!"

Haku turned to her, "But I can't go any farther."

"Wait…" Her eyes widened, her bottom lip started to tremble as her mind actually processed what her ears had heard. "What?" Her voice shook with rising tears as she asked the question.

"Just go back the way you came," he gave her a reassuring smile, "you'll be fine. But you have to promise _not_ to look back, not until you've passed through the tunnel."

"Wait… But what about you, Haku? I thought we could—" She shook her head to clear away her words, her selfish desire, and instead grabbed his hand with both of hers, clinging to it. "So… What will you do?"

"Don't worry – I'll go back and have a… _Talk_ with Yubaba. I'll tell her I'm going to quit being her apprentice." Chihiro chewed on her bottom lip, and looked askance, brows drawn.

"But won't she—?"

"I'll be fine. I've got my name back, after all!" His smile widened, his eyes softened; "And it's all thanks to you."

She felt her cheeks heat up at the praise, but she grinned back nonetheless.

"Ah!" A sudden thought made her grin falter slightly.

"Ano… W-will we meet again sometime…?"

"I'm sure we will," came Haku's immediate, and confident reply.

"Promise?" Chihiro sounded a little dubious, though it was rather difficult to be so when faced with his absolute conviction.

"Promise!"

"Pinkie promise?" Her mien was solemn as she stuck out her little finger.

He laughed brightly, but indulged her, curling his finger tightly around hers. "Pinkie promise." With that, he gently pushed her forward towards the first step; "Now go, and remember: don't look back!"

She nodded, and though she held onto his hand for as long as she could, stretching out her arm to keep the connection to the one she loved, slowly but surely her fingers slipped from his – one by one – until their hands parted.

Chihiro made her way down the rest of the steps, splashed easily across the small stream, and up onto the bank on the other side. As she made her way over the crest of the hill, she paused, overcome by the desire to glance over her shoulder at Haku one last time.

"_Don't look back!_"

The memory of his words stopped her in the middle of the motion and she turned back to the way in front of her. Voices drifted past her ears on the wind as she waded through the tall grass, voices that were very familiar to her.

"_Chihiro!_"

Her face lit up in joy; she started running; "Mum! Dad!"

Haku, meanwhile, had watched her back as she skipped over the brook and slowly climbed up the hill on the far side. He kept his eyes on her, his heart in his throat as he saw her, almost in slow motion, start to look back.

_No! She'll be trapped here if she does it… Chihiro! __**Stop!**_

To his great surprise, she did. His eyes widened in disbelief, and a strangled noise, born of confusion, sounded from his throat. Had she managed – somehow – to hear his mental cry of desperation?

It was only once she had disappeared from sight, once he knew that there was no chance of her hearing him, that he allowed his façade to crumble. And, once he had, he found that he had no control over the tears that streamed from his eyes and down his face.

He couldn't find the energy within him to wipe them away; instead, his knees crumpled beneath him, and he landed hard on the cold, harsh stone of the steps.

And then, Haku wept bitterly into his hands.

"I-I lied to her… I _lied._ I'm sorry, Chihiro… I'm so sorry! We-we…

"We won't ever see each other again!"


End file.
